PHOTO: Above, Parkers Crossroads, West Tennessee (2008). Below, Gettysburg, PA (2013).
I have a lot to tell you, but I’m not quite ready to say it yet. So, here’s a rock-solid truth: THIS GIRL LOVES CANNONS.
1. I tried to convince my senior class to purchase a cannon for our class gift. No one else wanted to do it, but seriously — it would have been totally badass to fire a cannon off at every graduation. A gift that keeps on giving.
2. The best Independence Day celebrations involve shooting off cannons. Also, period costumes because OH MY GOSH hilarious. I love to see men in tiny short pants and knee socks. It’s just too much, I can’t even handle it. But honestly — I can. Bring it on.
3. The 150th Anniversary of the Battle of Gettysburg is being celebrated with a full three-day reenactment of the entire battle beginning July 4. I’m not sure I’m going there, but seriously — this is a thing that every person everywhere should know about and be talking about. IMAGINE THE NUMBER OF CANNONS THAT WILL BE FIRED.
4. When I was a middle-sized kid I lived in Edenton, NC and there were a ton of cannons (to be more accurate, like 20…or maybe 5) along the edge of the sound (it’s like the fancy NC name for bay) to ward off PIRATES. Another thing I totally love. Actually, pirates are NOT things, they are persons. But I still love them. Those cannons were paid for pound-for-pound with tobacco. Seriously.